Criminally good stuff.
The defendant was doing her washing at the laundrette in question when a photograph in the complimentary magazine she was reading caught her attention. It was of a cake-stand filled with the most decadent treats, and a man standing next to it with the expression of a proud father on his face. One of the treats on the stand was a chocolaty bar-shaped object, temptingly glistening in the perfect lighting the photographer had arranged.
It emerged that the man was a former shoe designer starting a cheeky brasserie in London. The defendant was first tempted to perform the vile act she is accused of, when she noticed that the shoe man had kindly provided the magazine with a recipe for the bar.
The defendant thought long and hard. She had no pen or paper. Her mobile phone could perhaps be used to store the recipe until she got home, but writing it in the manner of text messages did not appeal to her.
She then looked around her and found that the only other customer at the laundrette was a darling of an old man, who was already packing up his newly washed clothes. When the man was gone, temptation proved too much and the defendant tore off the page. The defendant would like to plead guilty, Your Honour.
Evidence: The dedendant was in possession of the above objects.
NANAIMO BARS
Bottom layer:
100g unsalted butter
50g sugar
5 tbps cocoa powder
1 egg, beaten
200g digestive biscuits, or similar
75g desiccated coconut
100g finely chopped pecans
Pop the biscuits in a plastic bag and whack them with a rolling pin until fine. Melt the butter with the sugar and cocoa in a saucepan.
Mix in the dry ingredients and then the beaten egg. At this point I panicked at the amount of biscuit mix I had and decided to make two trays of bars. Next time I'll make just the one.
Line a 23x23cm baking tray with greaseproof paper or foil. Press the biscuit mixture in evenly and chill in the fridge.
Second layer:
2 tbsp custard powder
3 tbsp milk
50g butter
250g icing sugar
Mix together custard and milk, add butter and sugar. Be patient and beat until very light – lighter than what I've got here. Spread on the biscuit base and chill.
Top layer:
75g dark chocolate
50g butter
Melt the butter in a saucepan. Let the chocolate melt in the warm butter and mix well.
Allow to cool but not set. Spread over the second layer and chill.
When set, cut into bars or squares. The top layer will cut neatly when room-temperature, not fridge-cold.
This is a traditional recipe named after a town in Canada. The second and third layer are so sweet you definitely need a thick biscuit base for balance. I decided to make mine half as thin, as I mentioned earlier, and it ended up a little bit too thin in comparison.
The terrorised magazine was the Style supplement of The Sunday Times, the latest issue, I think. Name of recipe quoted by the article was Mrs Cox’s killer Nanaimo bars, and I don’t think killer was used purely to mean ‘awesome’. Carb alert! These will give you a nice sugar high if that’s what you’re into.
Mrs Cox’s son Patrick the Shoe Man will be opening Cox Cookies & Cake at 13 Brewer St., Soho, London on September the 1st.
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